I went to Amsterdam to witness Newcastle United's abject failure to progress in the Uefa Cup. They were knocked out by Alkmar, which is 20 odd miles away. I took my camera but after the first day was far too hungover to take many photos. I went to the Van Gogh museum which was great. He was obviously mad as a hatter but it was amazing to see such a big collection of his paintings. When I was in Paris, the Van Goghs at the Musee d'Orsay were easily the best thing I saw there, art wise.
BBC SPORT | Football | Saturday's football photos
Newcastle Utd got off to a winning start, beating Wigan 2-1, in the opener to the Premiership 2006-2007, though it sounds like they were a little lucky.
I love this photo of new skipper Scott Parker, who I think might get himself an England call-up this season as he is going to have more licence to get forward, rather than playing in the holding role. I also hope Shola Ameobi has a good season as I have him at £10 at 34-1 to be the top English scorer in the Premiership, and he started by bouncing one in yesterday. It is not a crazy bet as you might think - sure there is Rooney and Bent and Defoe and Johnson to beat but not Henry and Schevchenko.
The Sunday Times and several Guardian writers seemed to think Nufc would finish around eleventh. But I expect Newcastle to finish between fifth and seventh if they can get targets like Klose / Martins, Huth, Bridge and Gravesen. I can see teams like Everton and Portsmouth and West Ham doing well - and Blackburn and Bolton, maybe. But I can see us being ahead of them.
I'd like to see a line up like this:
Given
Carr Huth Taylor Bridge
Parker Gravesen
NZogbia
Martins Ameobi Duff
With Owen coming in near the end of the season. Such a team could win the Uefa Cup or Carling Cup, or even FA Cup and end our drought of 2 million years since we won anything. My dad has started doing video interviews before each game - which are great, and a very modern way of keeping tabs of what he is up to.
At the start of yesterday's game I got the anticipated call from my dad at the match in which he did not say anything but let me listen to the atmopshere. He calls my Toon-supporting grandma as well.
The return of the Premiership - after an eternal, agonising, two-minute break since the World Cup, also means the return of Premiership Pro, fantasy league, in which my team is pitted against 10 managed by my friends.
The best thing about the game is how it heightens your enjoyment of the whole of the Premiership, rather than just your own team. You scan transfer gossip and keep abreast of punditry to try and give you an edge. You loan support to other teams if they contain your players.
This season I am the chairman and had to organise the auction which was last Monday at a pub on Farringdon Street, which was great fun. We reserved an upstairs room because some managers were worried at being so openly geeky in public - that said I saw on Friday another group of blokes doing their teams, completely shamelessly in the corner of the Prince Regent, near Herne Hill.
I take it probably too seriously, for some reason. Last year I turned up to the auction with an enormous ringbinder of stats. This year Danny noticed during the auction that I appeared at one point to have palpatations after paying too much for Nolan. Darren Willis - a fantastic comment-leaver on Credo - did a fine job as auctioneer. I wish I had taken my camera but wanted to play down my reputation as Lenscap at social functions with my friends - I was dubbed this at a recent wedding after it was pointed out that I needed to remove it to take proper photographs.
My starting line-up is: Given, Ekotto, Eboue, Brown, Carragher, Ballack, Downing, Nolan, Convey, Berbatov, Ameobi, Roberts, Adebayor, Kalou, and Lita.
Not bad, although I arguably have too many strikers.
I decided to call the league this seaon the Garth Crooks Intellectuals' League in homage to the BBC's 'thinking football man'. I think this is very magnanimous of me after an indicent in the Chelsea press room last season when Mr Crooks, his mouth full of food, nodded impolitely at me to get out of the way of the flastscreen tv he was watching.
My initials are MAO, and I have been asking my fellow managers to refer to me as Chairman Mao. My team is Mao Utd. I finished runner up last season - team name Oliphantasticos - and won the year before that. If I don't win this year it will be a case of Apocalypse Mao.
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